Words... (by E. McCarley)

Oh dear,
What can I say
I'm high here
Up and spinning away
From a kiss of a thrill to be filled can someone hear me

Love, what do you say?
Your mystery winds me up to be playful
Here goes my curious center with it is someone listening
I hope no one is listening

How do I slow down
I can relay to my heart now
I've thrown what i've known isn't love for me out?
I'm running on empty

Time says it's the end of the day
My inside says for your lips to forget what time says
Do I let go of the fear when you steal the logic around me
Oh god save me I'm trying

I think I'll disappear
Leave my head in the air
For a chance to feel
So far far away from here
I know I can't stay too long
(("lovesick mistake"))


It’s time for you to prove,
Within your ruby shoes
You deserve a smile with no regret,
Look at you
Kicking off your shoes,
Dancing for the world to see,
You got the power to believe,
Open up and see,
And I’ll be free and fly away,
(("pony"))


Hello, goodbye
good day, goodnight
you love, you hide
Why?
You spring, you fall
turned on, turned off
what's wrong, what's wrong, love?

you say
you don't know, you don't know
you don't know.
you say you don't know
you don't know, you don't know what's on your mind

I'd love to hear you say
anything but silence
you're unaware that I'm so tired
And I've tried to understand
am I the only one cares here?
I can't let you, let you disappear
(("hello goodbye"))


You want me to be the God up in your sky
You want me to be that apple of your eye
So sweet to think you could make you mine
Well, it's not so easy

You want me to feel revival in your touch
You want me to feel everything you're dreaming of
But darling I'm tired, I'm all used up
Oh, it's not so easy, it's not so easy

My love, this is more than I can give
This is more than I can take
My love, I don't wanna let you in
To be another mess to me
I don't trust me with loving you

I wish I could be that diamond you've waited for
Yeah, I do believe when you say you won't take what isn't yours
But if I were you I'd walk right out that back door
It's not that easy, I'm not so easy
(("it's not that easy"))


I separated my heart from my head
To feel out what’s inside
I don’t like what I see so I say
Good night

Don’t wake me cuz I’m dreaming in color
Black and white is not my friend
Candy coded figures only in my bed

I’ve never been so deep inside a shadow
I’ve never been so insecure of what I know

I’ve gotta figure it out
I need a story to tell
Where’s the feeling I long for
I’ve gotta figure it out
Before I lose you love

Big city streets are calling me loud
The busy keeps me high
Well this quiet town is wearing me down tonight

Well I know that I should stay here for a while
Listen to the sound
Of my shaky heart
Looking for gold in the ground
(("gotta figure"))


Face down, on top of your bed.
Oh why did I give it up to you?
Is this how I shoot myself up high,
Just high enough to get through?

Again, the false affection.
Again, we break down inside.
Love save the empty.
Love save the empty, and save me.

Sad boy, you stare up at the sky
When no one's looking back at you.
You wear your every last disguise;
You're flying, then you fall through.

Stars feel like knives,
They tell us why we're fighting.
Storm, wait outside.
Oh, love, hold us together.
(("love save the empty"))


Pitter pat, the angel on my shoulder
Is haunting me tonight
Tick tock, the clock is getting louder
Ready for me to decide

I've lost my sense of right and wrong
Well-justified my soul to carry on
It feels so damn good to write off the rules
But when a new day breaks
I'm left a fool
I'm such a fool

Pain takes my heart's place
But your sweet sweet love,
Oh, I can taste it
But still can't face it
(("pitter-pat"))

I Thought I Saw Your Face Today...

The cars and freeways implore me to stay way out of this place
My mother said just keep your head and play it as it plays

I somehow see what's beautiful in things that are ephemeral
I'm my only friend, am I?
Love is just a piece of time
in the world
And I couldn't help but fall in love again

-she & him-

Silent Ambush

You stumbled on my hunting ground
too bad... really.
you were such a lovely thing
til I found out your secrets
Run away now

Taste my last kiss, my silent ambush
Take one last look & beg for mercy.

Don't try dishing out more lies
'cause I'm serious
you've wandered into open season and
I'm bored and furious
run away now

Sometimes I can't help wondering
how I might wear your apology..
but that's no fun.

Run away now.

-rie sinclair-

Goodies.

I faintly remember breathing on your bedroom floor
Where I laid and told you, but you swear you loved me more
-boxcarracer-

We'll go to the bottom of every bottle
The end of theline on every story
Those times we miss, those times we reminisce
Those were the good old days
I hold in heart and cherish. Never forget
-jersey-

The liquors there just to keep you warm.
-june-

I know, you know what.
I'll fold, I'll forget.
Will you?
-june-

Sometimes the hardest things in life
Are the things we have to do
-thejulianatheory-

This is a lovesong for the desperate and the lonely.
You could have nothing but you’ll still have me.
-thejulianatheory-

I’m alive but not inside.
And you know all I wanted was your love,
but you left me high and dry.
You’re the part of me that died my darling.
-thejulianatheory-

You were the one to gun our love straight down
like a stone in a river.
You shot your favorite enemy.
Watch me bleed.
-thejulianatheory-

What good is dreaming when I can't even sleep here?
What good is lying down with no one to hold?
What good is letting go when something won't let me?
What good is saying goodbye now that you're gone?
-thejulianatheory-

Baby never calls me now.
She don't need a past to dream about,
living life the way the stars abound.
And who am I to tell her "Pull them down?"
Baby doesn't need a drink.
Lord knows she never stops to think.
-thejulianatheory-

It's kind of laughable how life tends to spin us out,
after beating us down like it did before.
It's finally laughable how it rains and it pours again,
I'll just stand here soaking it all in.
Well if this is how life is,
I won't back down from this: anymore.
-thejulianatheory-

Dammit

And maybe
I'll see you
at a movie
sneak preview
You'll show up
and walk by
on the arm
of that guy
And I'll smile
and you'll wave
we'll pretend
it's okay
-blink 182-

VDday

"The best and most beautiful things in the
world cannot be seen or even touched.
They must be felt with the heart."
-Helen Keller-

If Juliet was stupid enough to fall for the enemy,
drink a bottle of poison, and go to sleep in a mausoleum,
then she deserved everything she got.
-Grey's Anatomy-

Skipping beats, blushing cheeks, I am struggling
Daydreaming, bed scenes in the corner cafe
And then I'm left in bits, recovering tectonic tremblings,
you get me every time.
-imogen heap-

I am a mirror with no reflection,
I am a razor without my blade
I am the daylight when the moon shines no
who will want to make my sandcastle that's already made?
-imogen heap-

I swear that I’ve been here before
on this same couch with this same disregard..
Baby, this is where darkness lives
and it’ll catch you off your guard.
I hope you can believe there’s more to me
than what you see.
-obadiah parker-

We're damned by the existential moment where
We saw the couple in the coma and
It was we were the cliché,
But we carried on anyway.
-ben folds-

You always said I was an actor, baby
Guess in truth you thought me just amateur.
-ray lamontagne-

She is left all alone
Her lover's out to sea
And I cant help her feel that she is just like me.
-meiko-

I've never been so deep inside a shadow
I've never been so insecure of what I know
I've gotta figure it out
I need a story to tell.
-erin mccarley-

How does circumstance
Seem to cost us every chance
At living out the truth in our hearts?
-kina grannis-

These words are my diary, screaming out loud.

But someday we'll all be old
And I'll be so damn beautiful
Meanwhile I'll hide my head
Here in this paper bag

I'm a girly-girl. I pretend that I'm not sometimes, and other times, I announce it proudly. Romance novels and glasses of wine are my ultimate weakness. I'm a sure addict of Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice. I'm pretty caught up in General Hospital, and I would absolutely love to be a soap actress. Laugh all you want... It's what I fantasize about. No joking around. Getting/giving myself pedicures puts me such a fantastic mood. I love getting dressed up, just as much as I love to don a pair of sweats and watch chick-flicks and silly romantic movies. Watching Extreme Makeover: Home Edition makes me bawl like a baby... No lie. I sob. I'm not ashamed to cry about things. I own too many shoes, clothes and jewelery, and I don't ever wear 2/3 of it... But I find excuses to keep them all. I'm a sucker for puppies, babies and bubble baths. McDreamy and Tom Brady top my list, and I named my GPS after a character on one of my shows. Bring me roses or chocolate and my heart is won over. Candles... Big fan.

I am a girly-girl in so many ways... and in so many ways, I'm not. I have many fronts and I have many attributes that stem from the different labels that compose my individual person. Some days, I love grunge and other days, I prefer the "rock'n'roll" idea/label/style/existence. Sometimes the only thing I need are a good pair of pajamas, a bowl of popcorn, a beer and the television. Other times, I like pretending I'm someone different.

Today, I'm a girly-girl.

Lights.

Straighten up your tie, take the microphone.
Forget about it, don't let it get you down.
Now is not the time, and you're not alone.
Shut up about it, no one can bring you down now.